Way back 2018, I found myself in a really bad place — I got addicted to online loaning apps.

I was a typical 22-year old who wanted to live the life by travelling, constant eating out and hanging out with friends, partying, and buying really unnecessary expensive things to flex. You might say that that’s okay; that we should live life because as the millennials always say, you only live once. The problem was, I was not financially capable of having all these luxuries in my life. But because I wanted to be “in”, I got myself to a place I wouldn’t want to be in ever again.

It started out when I needed money to travel. I was working as a Production Assistant, which was my first job, and understandably it does not pay that much. I was also a breadwinner, so most of my money goes to the rest of my family. I saw an ad on Facebook about a loaning app, and I immediately downloaded one on my phone. Process was easy; you just to fill in your details, scan your valid ID, wait for an approval, and voila, money goes into your bank account in less than 3 business days. My first loan was P2,000, and I remembered paying it right away. I should have stopped right there when I paid it off, but lo and behold, I found myself loaning again. The P2,000 loan became P3,000, then it became P5,000, and then P8,000, until I got a P10,000 loan. Honestly, I didn’t know where all that money went.

When you think that loaning P10,000 for nothing is already my worse state, well, let me prove you wrong. Struggling to pay off that hefty amount in one loaning app, I poorly decided to loan again in a different loaning app. Struggling AGAIN to pay that, I loaned again in another one. I caught myself being looped into a never-ending cycle of loaning and paying, juggling three online loans at once.

What started out as something I did to have fun, ended up something that took a toll on me mentally and financially. For over a year, the online loaning cycle continued. Interests of these loans were sky-high, you see. This drained whatever money I had left, and also increased my anxiety, to the point where I started to get less sleep.

The year 2019 came, I decided that I wanted myself out of this. I started paying off the debts and resisted myself to repeat loan. I gave up all the luxuries that I usually do, and it was definitely worth it. After many months of paying every single peso of my loans, I finally got free. And boy, freedom tasted like the most expensive thing that I could ever afford.

How did I do it? Here are some of the things I learned from experience:

Break the cycle. The first step into getting out of the situation, is deciding to get out. You got to have the will power to break the cycle and to pay off the debt without having to loan again. This will be hard financially, but eventually it’s going to be worth it.

Learn how to say NO. Say YES to saying NO. Who could have thought that just by saying no, I saved a great amount of money? During the time that I was breaking the cycle, I said no to a lot of things and a lot of people. I said no to travels, to eating and hanging out, I said no to partying. Some friends may get angry, but real friends will understand and will support you whatever happens. Not everyone has the financial capability and freedom like you, honey.

You also have to say no to yourself too. You just got to have that self-control to not spend any more money into unnecessary things. Don’t give into peer pressure.  Mind over matter always.

Declutter your expenses. Like I said earlier, I have to give up some luxuries in order for me to get out of debt. I took out all the things that I think was unnecessary into my life. For example, in 2019 I gave up travelling. As much as I want to get out of the pollution of Manila, I gave it up so I can pay off my loans. I also gave up eating out with friends frequently. It’s okay to go out, but remember to choose only things that are worth spending. If you don’t like drinking, why would you spend thousands a night going to bars, right? Ask yourself what Marie Condo always ask, “does it spark joy”? If it does not, then it’s not worth spending for.

Budget your money. Very self-explanatory. Learn how to properly manage your income before you spend on anything. What I always do, is to divide my money into four: bills, savings, expenses, and free money. Money for bills and savings are the first ones to go, then I get a fixed amount of money for my everyday expenses like food and transportation. Minus all that, you have your free money. This is the money that you can spend for your wants. However small or big that free money is, it’s still free money, right? Just discipline yourself not to go beyond your means.

Save. I’ve mentioned that part of my budget goes into savings. After I paid off all my debts, I decided that it’s time to open a savings account. I try to save a fixed amount of money every pay day, but if budget is tight, I just try to save whatever I can. Make it a part of your budget to save, because you never know when you’ll need that emergency money. During the pandemic, most of my family members didn’t have an income because of the No Work, No Pay policy of their company. I was lucky to have little savings to pay the bills.

Reward yourself. You don’t always have to deprive yourself. Again, you just have to choose things that are worth spending for. When I was paying off those loans, I felt really low. So I decided to spend a small amount of money on myself every payday as a treat. It may be just a simple 200-peso meal that you’ve been craving for, or a long sought-after massage, you deserve a reward for being disciplined with your money. Use your free money for these simple pleasures.

I understand that sometimes, we can’t always help but borrow money for our needs especially during these trying times. Online loans, after all, are very convenient. But just remember that everything comes with a price, and whether it’s losing more money to interests or sacrificing your inner peace, sometimes, you end up paying more for the poor decisions that you do.

Some people still get angry at me for being “kuripot” nowadays, but I don’t mind. As long as I know that I am living within my means and I am spending my money into things that I really need or want, then I don’t owe anyone an explanation. I am no financial expert, but I do hope that by telling my experience and struggles with money I can inspire you a little make better decisions.

 Spend wisely!